Monday, February 16, 2009

Scattershots: Daytona 380, Fear the Bong, and Rockin' the Faux-Hawk.

  • NASCAR blew it. A sport already reeling from economic stress needed to start the season with a bang. Not a flat tire. Nothing is more anti-climactic than declaring the winner of the sport's biggest race, the Daytona 500, during a rain delay. Can you imagine the NFL calling a winner after the third quarter? The Masters after the third round? Major League Baseball after the 6th inning in game 7? The Daytona 380 is a terrible idea. If there's too much rain to finish that night, race the next day, even if the stands are half empty. The Daytona 500 jump-starts NASCAR's entire season, and ending under an umbrella brings no one new to the party.
  • Authorities in South Carolina are trying to build a case to arrest Michael Phelps. In the history of ill-advised bong hits, few have paid more of a price than Phelps already has. (update 2/16: South Carolina Sheriff's office says there will be no charges against Phelps.)
  • Don't think winning cures all? Six months ago Kirk Ferentz was under fire for all the arrested Hawkeyes off the field. Four months ago, Ferentz faced harsh criticism for his coaching on the field. Iowa then went on a roll, upset #3 Penn State, and blew out South Carolina in a January bowl game. Ferentz just signed a new 7 year contract.
  • Good to see Ferentz and Gary Barta were smart enough to not add any more money to Ferentz's deal. The $3 million a year already caused Ferentz more strife than he ever wanted. Not his fault. If channel 13 wanted to pay me $3 million (they don't), I'd take it.
  • I didn't think there was any way for the Packers to come out of the year long Favre soap opera looking better than Favre, but they do.
  • Can't we make Hank Aaron the home run king again? Probably not.
  • Pitchers and catchers report to spring training. I'm trying to get excited, but I'm still suffering from A-Rod fatigue and Cubs hangover.
  • According to the Birmingham News, Gene Chizik says "he's never made a mistake, and never failed". This guy is unbelievable. He made too many mistakes to mention at Iowa State, and he most certainly failed. Iowa State's fortunate to get out of the Chizik era without owing this fraud money.
  • I was sick on the couch all weekend. That means I watched a lot of losing basketball. It doesn't take a bad cold to realize what Greg McDermott and Todd Lickliter are missing: talented players. These guys have both proven they can coach. You won't take UNI to NCAA tournaments, or Butler to the Sweet 16 if you're a coaching moron. In the big conferences, you have to have the players. They don't. Both need to seriously upgrade recruiting, or they're going to be out of jobs in the next couple years.
  • Have you ever tried Tabasco sauce on popcorn? Andy's wife, Kahala, does this... and I'm hooked. Though it burns my fingernails.
  • I wish I had enough hair to rock a faux-hawk like Dave Price.
  • I don't buy Joaquin Phoenix's wackjob act, but I do think it's a fascinating stunt, reminiscent of Andy Kauffman on Lettermen twenty years ago. People fell for that too.
  • We just watched the chick flick, "Definitely, Maybe". It was definitely, maybe pretty good. I liked it. (Assist to Geoff on correcting title.) "Swing Vote" was a swing and a miss. Kevin Costner is likeable---all the actors are good---but the movie doesn't know what it wants to be: silly, serious, or satirical. Also watched "W". Josh Brolin brings it, but W just isn't quite entertaining enough.
  • What's your favorite Valentine's Day treat? I'm leaning toward the chocolate covered strawberry. It's much better than a chocolate covered hard boiled egg.

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you're giving Joaquin too much credit.

Geoff Wood said...

Did you mean "Definitely, Maybe"? I liked the film, too. Ryan Reynolds has been pretty good in every role since since "2 Guys, A Girl, and a Pizza Place"

Keith Murphy said...

Good catch, Geoff. I absolutely got that wrong. I'll go back and fix.

Anonymous said...

If there is a case for Phelps to be arrested, shouldn't there also be a case for A-Rod to be be arrested also? I think steriods are illegal in this country without a prescription.

Shawn said...

The more Gene Chizek runs his mouth, the more I realize what a jack*** he is. How arrogant can you get? I hope he gets smoked at Auburn. Then he will finally have to "search" for a job instead of always being the chosen one in his mind. What an idiot.

The "Dude" Diggler said...

Dude, you gotta go out partying with Michael Phelps sometime. I guarantee you'll be all about "chocolate covered hard boiled eggs" then dude.

Anonymous said...

I completely agree about the Daytona 500. What a disappointment to watch all that time and then have it end that way. Maybe they should start the race earlier in the day allowing for a rain delay (since it rains all the time in Florida). Maybe they should put an asterisk next to Kenseth's name since he won on a technicality! HA HA

I like Kirk Ferentz. I'm a big Hawkeye fan and always will be. Sometimes I wonder why Ferentz takes so much heat for the football players getting into trouble. Why don't any of the college professors take heat because one of the students enrolled in their classes got an OWI? Granted, Ferentz recruits these guys to come to Iowa, but college is often times a culture shock for a lot of kids. Peer pressure and stupidity are common events in young peoples lives (insert Michael Phelps example here). Is anyone blaming Phelps' coach for his stupidity?

Anyway...those are just my rambling views. Murph I love the movie reviews and someday when I have more free time I'll start watching the good ones! :) We miss you on Facebook...hopefully you'll join the world soon!

Anonymous said...

How do you coach swimming? This is all they have to do;

GO FASTER, BREATHE, GO FASTER DUMMY!

Anonymous said...

Have you ever been to a swim meet or practice for that matter? There is a lot more to it than "GO FASTER, BREATHE, GO FASTER DUMMY!."
Did you instinctively know how to do the all the swimming strokes the first time you got in the pool? Are you implying that every kid that gets in a swimming pool has the skills to win a swim meet? Keep in mind that doggie-paddling is not an event at most swim meets.

Thanks for the ignorance, it was worth a good laugh tonight!

Anonymous said...

Post, breathe, stop posting swimming dummy.

Anonymous said...

Your parents should have drowned you in the pool so the rest of the world would not have to read your stupid two cents worth.

Yours truly,
"Swimming Dummy"

shane - marshalltown said...

Maybe NASCAR should consider changing the 2nd race of the season, to help the first and biggest race of their season...It has to be a logistical nightmare to move a race team...or 45, from Florida to California in less than 5 days anyway, so switch it with Atlanta.

Then your first 4 races would look like this:

1. Daytona Florida
2. Atlanta Georgia
3. Las Vegas Nevada
4. Fontana California

Then MAYBE you could run the rest of the Daytona 500 on a Monday, instead of having to scrap the last 48 laps...

Anonymous said...

Dear Swimming Dummy,
You should be more like Mike and take a few hits off of the bong. Too much practice and not enough recreation has left you scarred and angry.

Yours Truly
Swimmer Guy who never had a coach

Anonymous said...

Hank Aaron said the record belongs to Barry Bonds. End of discussion.

Anonymous said...

I hate people that end posts with the words, end of discussion.

Anonymous said...

Doh!!!!

shane - marshalltown said...

Barry Bonds shouldn't be the homerun king just because Hank Aaron is a class act.

Restart of discussion.

Timmy said...

It's pretty funny how Keith and Andy make Chris Hassell do stupid animal tricks to be on Soundoff.

Dance Monkey Dance!

Anonymous said...

Okay Shane from Marshalltown. Babe Ruth is arguably the single most beloved sports figure in American sports history. You could make arguments for others, but just about everyone knows who Babe Ruth is. While I suppose he did not technically break the 18th Amendment, when: the manufacture, sale, or transportation of intoxicating liquors within, the importation thereof into, or the exportation thereof from the United States and all territory subject to the jurisdiction thereof for beverage purposes is hereby prohibited; it is pretty hard to understand how the man drank a beer legally from 1920-1933 within the borders of the US. This was not a law, this was an Amendment to the Constitution. Yeah, a lot of people broke it and it was repealed, but the fact is it was still a CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT and the Babe somehow magically drank beer within the borders of the US.

Yet few seem concerned with that fact. For all we know, the Babe may have sold a beer, putting him in direct violation of the Constitution.

I say kick the Babe out of the HOF for using illegal substances while playing. Fair is fair.

So shut up.

Kirk Diggler said...

Wow, the Barry Bond's apologist now steps up to "so shut up". I don't think anything that Babe Ruth took was "performance enhancing", in fact, most would argue that it was the opposite.
Your lecture on prohibition and the legality of alcohol at certain times in our history was not necessary, but I understand your point. The problem with your point is that it is weak and forced out of a tantrum.
I'll ask you a question though. If Barry Bonds had never been associated with steroids, but had been busted a few times for doing and posessing cocaine, do you think there would be any talk about removing him as the all time home run leader?
Big difference between an illegal recreational drug and an illegal performance enhancing.


So shut up as this discussion is over dummy. Well unless Shane wants to pile on.

Anonymous said...

Bonds is the greatest player to step on a baseball field. Just consider yourselves lucky to witness his Hall of Fame career in real life. End of discussion.

shane - marshalltown said...

Dear "Shut up" Guy,

Alcohol is only "performance enhancing" in bowling and possibly darts...If you want say he should've been arrested because of prohibition, you'll have to separate your apples from your oranges and go from there.

Thank you

shane - marshalltown said...

By the way...the only thing I consider myself lucky to have watched, when it comes to Bonds, is when Kerry Wood and Mark Prior would intentionally plunk him...that was always a fun time, roids or not!

Anonymous said...

Shane from Marshalltown,

Go ahead and go back to your blow-up doll with Keith Murphy's picture taped onto the face. We all know you want to.

Anonymous said...

Please excuse Barry Bond's apologist, as he has had a bad reaction to the Boli he got over the counter in the Dominican Republic.

Signed
Epstein's Mother

shane - marshalltown said...

You can't beat good "blow up doll" smack...

You can almost feel the roid rage! I guess his backne is flaring up...

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